I want to be a ‘winner’ who leaves the world a better place

I often wondered what it meant to be a ‘winner.’ Now I know a winner sees a problem and, with teamwork, finds solutions.

All and sundry, tall or brief, purple or blue, is a part of a society. at once we are born, we fall into the warm but unfamiliar include of society. Thereafter, we're alleged to metamorphosize into “winners.”

To at the present time, i'm not certain what a winner need to seem like. Are they pink? Or possibly blue?

In discovering what society expects folks, who're the destiny little children, I did now not pass too a long way. On a hot Saturday afternoon after eating a meal healthy for a king, I headed out to my local mall to inquire. I received all forms of answers. One center aged lady stated, “My son? Oh absolutely, he seems like a health practitioner! i will see it in his eyes.” An older guy about 65 years of age made an alarming conjecture. “My daughter? She is match to be a wife.”

Even beyond the infant degree, society by no means weakens its grip on the very soles of our feet. As i was processing those very imposing answers, I passed off to meet a young boy being scolded by using his grandfather. He stated to the teenage male, “you're a guy. guys are to be unsightly and apprehensive. The simplest emotion you ought to express outwardly is anger.”

Anger changed into now not the only emotion stirred up in me. I realized at that second that the journey of self-attention had simply all started. the journey of finding the bridge between all these expectations and what our inner selves honestly desired.

I commenced reminiscing on how life has opened up in the front of my 18-12 months-old eyes. On my route to breaking loose from the yoke of society’s expectations to a private measurement of achievement, i have learnt both a way to be abased and a way to abound.

In my life, my showdown with society changed into in the shape of the expectations of all the ones round me. nine-yr-old Maame noticed failure because the hallmark of her existence. the feeling of failure turned into certainly a acquainted pal growing up. dwelling in my grandparents’ residence with my mother and my sister taught me to be cozy with having little. you will in no way wager that developing up, existence changed into hard. I had my foot twisted in methods a foot shouldn’t. i used to be so appropriate at beaming with pleasure which you wouldn’t see the tsunami in my eyes. i will admit, there had been always oceans in the back of my eyes. They saved raging, however I had carefully mastered the art of maintaining them within their obstacles.

‘selecting your inner-self over societal expectancies’

All of the happenings of my life led up to at least one second that you will soon find out. This kairos second embodies the quote by means of the renowned author Edmond Mbiaka: “residing happily is an issue of choosing to meet the wonderful needs of your internal-self over your societal expectancies.”

Simply earlier than my 12th birthday, my father came back into our lives after ignoring our continual calls and lacking infinite birthdays. In my young thoughts, his go back symbolized a glimpse of hope but a good greater private project accompanied.

His go back again into my existence meant I had to be well worth staying for. I had to be the suitable final born child. My mom could say in twi, our nearby Ghanaian language, “Me Kaakyire, awiase p3 nipa a adi nkunim.” Which interprets to: “My closing born baby, the arena loves a winner.” truely on every occasion my file card got here again and it fell brief of expectations, that same stern voice might resound.

I got here to remember that gaining love from this society was indeed based totally on me being a winner. Father most effective got here to visit every time I got a distinction. I in no way clearly stricken approximately standing out in some thing other than academics due to the fact my private goal turned into to preserve society’s admiration with the aid of attaining A’s.

One time my high-quality friend stated to me, “You’re too comfortable wherein you're. there's nothing more to these appropriate grades to feature unto your self. That as an alternative makes you common”. i was flabbergasted. i was making the grades and keeping society’s love at the equal time, so why become I nevertheless now not sufficient? Why turned into I still no longer the winner mummy warned me to be?

however, like a bull at the sight of red, I had handiest one venture, and i would fight to dying to obtain it. after all, who wouldn’t want to feel cherished and, most significantly, by the surprising society?

prevailing on my terms

At age 14 I met my largest project yet. The very last test of my really worth. I had to, and i imply needed to, gain admission into one of the most aggressive worldwide Baccalaureate (IB) colleges in Ghana : SOS-HGIC university. consequently, when i used to be eventually regular, I should verify inside myself that I honestly turned into now not a disgrace. I in the end got the hang of triumphing.

My 12 months of doing the IB center Years application was natural bliss. I advanced each semester, but I nevertheless did no longer make it to the principal’s position. I spent sleepless nights, unknown to anybody, making massive cups of espresso a ritual. I had my glory second. I finished 7s in chains! Like a drug, i used to be equipped to take in the words of pleasure from all those round me, but all I got become a concise textual content message: “top notch paintings, subsequent semester push more difficult!”

All at once, I felt a disconnection that I had in no way felt before. I found out that there has been more to life than proscribing my worth to grades, although they may be crucial. I realized I wasted a lot potential looking to be enough for own family and instructors, when I needed to be enough for myself, too.

This eureka moment got here. I pushed myself to be an all-round winner. I participated in college events like spoken phrase for my school’s Orator of the year competition, shot-put and javelin, and i used to be an executive member of esteemed clubs like magnate network. ironically, I chased after the big awful wolf i used to be usually jogging far from. i used to be selected via my school leadership crew as a Prep and Library prefect. It sounded so unreal in my ears. i used to be a person nine-yr-old Maame might look up to.

All this i have stated is simply to say that turmoil will come. Thunder storms are coming near near. Twisted toes are going to be part of your future. but you need to keep going. ultimately, the tsunami will fade into oblivion, and you'll pass inspite of the oceans behind your eyes. you will journey into territories you in no way imagined. you will move oceans you by no means thought you can pass, finding your self planted on the soil of promise and opportunity. you will soar over skyscrapers you by no means knew existed. you will blossom.

Take my revel in as the final example. From it, i have painstakingly learnt treasured existence training which have contributed to my desire to be a higher international citizen at large. on this adventure of gaining knowledge of the way to be a winner, i have redefined who I ought to be. I now realize that you could be a winner in such a lot of various approaches. Being an impactful winner, one that leaves her footprints inside the sands of time, is what the arena truly wishes and should have a good time. A winner who does now not throw their fingers in the air at every inconvenience. A winner who sees a problem and, with teamwork, unearths solutions. That’s the winner the arena desires.

You is probably wondering, do I describe myself as a winner? nicely, triumphing to me is not the

 closing intention. i'm decided to leave the sector higher than i found it.